Dear Abby: The couple’s house is not their home with the parents next door
DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have been living together for almost five years. Her parents bought a house a few doors down. They come in whenever they feel like it and even enter our room while we are in bed. I need this to stop.
Her mom and I have argued in the past because she felt she had the right to control everything down to where I put my dirty laundry. It’s a touchy subject with my boyfriend, let alone his mother. Help me please. – NEEDS PRIVACY IN MARYLAND
DEAR NEEDS PRIVACY: No one should come into your house without first asking permission, and that goes for your boyfriend’s parents. For them to come into your room while you and their son are in bed is overkill.
I don’t understand why this would be a “touchy” subject with your boyfriend. When he became an adult and left his parents’ house, it surely had something to do with privacy. It’s time to change the locks on your doors.
Check with a professional mediator if necessary. If you can’t do it, start counting your blessings. The principal of them should thank the Lord that this woman is not your mother-in-law.
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DEAR ABBY: I am a 16 year old girl with a problem. It takes forever to pick out an outfit in the morning, no matter what the occasion. It’s not that I’m a fashionista. It’s just that I can’t seem to put anything in place that makes me feel comfortable.
I’m going to put something on, think I like it, walk into the bathroom, and then notice things that I don’t like. It’s starting to get on my nerves. I have tried shopping for clothes that I know I love, but even then it seems like I change my outfit three or four times before I leave. How can I feel more comfortable with what I’m wearing? – FASHION FIGHT IN MICHIGAN
DEAR FASHION STRUGGLE: Try to arrange your clothes and coordinate your accessories the day before. Once you’ve done that, leave the room for about an hour. If you like what you put together before you go to bed, chances are you like it in the morning. You’ll also be less stressed and won’t have wasted time obsessing before you leave the house.
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DEAR ABBY: I suffer because my mother favors my brother. I’ve talked to her about it a few times, but she said it hurts her when I say things like that. I’m not talking to him about it now, but I’m very upset about it.
I invited her to visit me so she can meet my fiancé, but she refuses. She says it’s too long in the car. I miss her dearly and want to see her. My fiance told me to give him time, but I don’t think that’s fair. What can I do about this situation? – RANKED SECOND IN NORTH CAROLINA
DEAR RANKED SECOND: Because you miss your mother and want to see her, I suggest you take the long drive and visit her. And when you do, bring your fiancé.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.